Terahertz

I too once hurt my big toe

Dr. PZ Myers (doctor of biology) offers Jeffrey Rowland advice on how to fix his recently stubbed toe after dropping a beer bottle on it (read below the comic).

Dr. Myers prescribes:

straighten out a paper clip, and use a match or a burner on the stove to get the tip red hot. Gently touch it to the center of the nail, which will basically melt away in a small spot. When you've just burned through, there will be a sudden spurt of blood that will sizzle a bit, but the pressure will be relieved. It will stop hurting and you probably won't lose the nail, and the operation is completely painless.

A trick he learned from his manual labourer father, who was "always getting smashed digits".

So what's my story here?

Around grade 5 or 6 I was walking from my bus to school in the middle of the winter while wearing my big winter boots. I was bored after getting right off the bus and upon seeing a large chunk of what I thought was snow I decided to kick it. Actually, I decided to show that snowball who was boss and I kicked it hard!

Unfortunately, I didn't realize it was a solid chunk of ice, likely frozen to the ground, and covered with a slight bit of fresh snow. When, after kicking, the chunk moved a bare few centimetres (note: any good Canadian story must include at least snow, the metric system, and British spellings like colour or metre) and my toe starting hurting like mad (I don't think I was swearing much at that age), I quickly realized my mistake.

Being a stubborn little trooper, I staggered to school (I should note the school buses dropped us off across a football field from the actual schools) and sat through the day without inspecting my toe (despite pain through the first couple classes). When I finally got home and took off my shoe I realized something was a bit more amiss when my sock was slightly damp (with a bit of blood). After carefully removing the sock I discovered my toenail was half fallen off, but still connected enough that it wasn't coming off without more pain.

Over the next few days (since I didn't feel a half fallen-off toenail warranted parental medical attention), my toenail eventually fell off and I was left with a sensitive bit of toe that had always known the warm protection of a nail. Still a little concerned about my toe never growing back, I decided to just let it be. Eventually it did completely grow back and I'm proud to say that today I have a full and healthy set of toenails.

So have you ever hurt your big toe?